Wow. It’s been a while. I hope you guys have missed me as much as I’ve missed you!
The break has been kind to me, but I also feel like I have some catching up to do.
I’m aware that I don’t have oodles of readers, but I did make some promises and I prefer to keep those promises. I will have some posts coming your way soon!
I’m currently looking out the window of the Grand Manan ferry, gazing at the sparkling water and smelling the salty air that brings me back to my childhood days. There’s so much about coming back here that makes me long for the days of old.
A piece of me will always live here.
I wish I could show you all how beautiful it is, but pictures do not do it justice. It’s divine. Breathtaking. And peaceful.
The ocean does that to me. It’s as if my heart, body and mind somehow sync together and know that I feel at home. Where I am happiest.
And as much as I yearn for the sand between my toes, I’ve also come to a realization over these past few years.
I now have two homes.
Two places that I long for. Where I want to be. Where a piece of me lives.
And that can get very confusing.
Growing up on an island, surrounded by the ocean, is something that I am thankful for. The way of life and what it taught me. It was secluded, yet cozy. Comfortable. Captivating.
I mean really, what’s better than an ocean view?
I can’t think of a single thing!
But now I have a new home. One that I’ve created. Built. I started all over, on my own, from scratch. And it’s a life that I’ve always dreamt of. I have everything I envisioned of having and I thank my lucky stars that I do.
Which is why it’s difficult.
I tend to feel a wealth of sadness whenever I think of leaving one to go to the other, or staying in one place instead of the other.
There’s depth, weight, with both options. My heart is torn and I’ve never felt, nor do I think I will ever feel, 100% complete no matter which place I’m in.
Life really does turn out differently than we expect it to. I always imagined staying on the East Coast and building my life here, where my family is, but I’m also grateful in a way that I didn’t because I wouldn’t have the husband, children, friends and family that I do now.
I think what frightens me most, is my heart lingering in limbo. Staying in the same spot forever. Never completely knowing where it wants to be.
… This is getting very personal. This definitely isn’t what I intended on writing during my wait on the boat, but I guess that is what blogging is all about, right?
Okay, let’s bring the energy back before I end this post!
And as I just typed that last line, the captain just announced on the intercom that there were whales sighted nearby! I quickly jumped out of my seat (leaving my laptop unattended… I have way too much trust in others) and set out to see for myself. Happily, I was able to see more than one! Something so small that makes my soul so happy! I took a few photos with my phone that I can’t wait to show Beau. He is obsessed with sea creatures at the moment!
The ferry is starting to round the corner, which means we will be docking shortly. Time to close up for now.
I’m off to my cousins baby shower and then I’ll be spending the night at her house which has a gorgeous (seriously..) view of the ocean. I’ll attempt to take a few photos and post on my Instagram so be sure to follow! I may even put up a few pictures of the whales 🙂
Bye for now!